My Girlfriend Ditched Me in Thailand...Here's What Happened

September 18, 2017

So, remember that amazing and fabulous solo trip I took to Thailand last November? If you weren't here for it, here's a photographic recap of that trip. The Bangkok leg of my vacation was absolutely phenomenal. I rode an elephant for the first time, shopped on a floating market, kissed a yellow python, and conversed with some of the friendliest, melanin-loving Asians I've ever met. Indeed, Bangkok was lit. It was my dream trip. But Phuket was another story. Phuket was a nightmare!

It all started with a "friend" I met over three years ago. We'll call her "Terica".

Terica and I met through a mutual friend. She's a politician who, at the time, was trying to raise money to go on a trip, excuse me, I meant she was trying to raise money for one of her "political campaigns". She and I hit it off immediately because we had similar personalities and generally had a great time together whenever we hung out. Although, in the very beginning of the relationship, I sensed she was an opportunist who used nice and kind people to her advantage. I ignored that part of her character and focused on the things I liked most about her: her drive, her ambition, and her desire to see the world as I did. She was impressed by my travels and took a liking to me because I lived the life she was working towards living.

Fast forward to planning our trip to Thailand...

Bangkok had always been on my bucket list and I was determined to travel there in 2016. Terica called me one day and told me she and another friend was planning to travel to Phuket in November and asked if I wanted to go. I informed her I was already planning to visit Bangkok; so, of course I would be interested in meeting them in Phuket. In essence, for me, it was two trips in one: a solo trip to Bangkok and a girl's trip to Phuket. #SheReady

Now, I'm a meticulous traveler. Weeks before I set out to explore foreign territory, I make sure I plan my entire itinerary, map out all of my activities, reserve my hotel rooms, and hatch a solo trip photography plan to make sure I'm able to have my picture taken at all the fabulous spots in the city I'm visiting. Terica isn't like that. For weeks leading up to our departure, I requested details on the hotel we were staying at in Phuket as well as any activities she had planned. I specifically wanted information about the hotel because A.) I needed to know where I was staying, and B.) I needed to know how much I was expected to contribute to the cost of our accommodation. Her response was, "Girl, don't worry about it. My homegirl works for the hotel chain. I got you." Okay, girl. If you say so.

The night before I left for my trip to Bangkok, I contacted Terica to confirm her and her friend's flight to Phuket. We were so excited about this trip, talked about how turned up we were going to be in Thailand, and then, out of the blue, she said, "Oh, by the way, just give me $600 for your share of the hotel room whenever you arrive in Phuket." Huh?! First of all, I had only planned to stay in Phuket with them for two nights. "And $600??? Where are we staying? The Four Seasons?? I thought you said your friend had an employee discount? And, again, WHERE ARE WE STAYING?!" She had yet to give me that information.

Out of consideration for your time, I'm not going to go into the rest of the conversation I had with her that night. What I will say, however, is that it appeared as if something fishy was going on with those two women and I didn't want any part of it and I definitely wasn't about to pay $600 to share a hotel room with anybody. So, I decided to take my solo trip to Bangkok and book my own accommodations in Phuket...$150 for a two-night stay in a luxurious condo through Airbnb, by the way. #WontHeDoIt

Side note: I had an absolute blast in Bangkok! If you're thinking about taking a trip there, please do! You will get your LIFE! The food is amazing, the prices are cheap, the people are welcoming, and the temples are spectacular! It was truly a trip of a lifetime. Now, back to Phuket...

After being in Thailand for five days, I had finally received information on where my friend and her friend were staying at in Phuket. I took a short flight from Bangkok to Phuket and met them at a beautiful resort on the beach. When I arrived, the energy was stale (you know, that negative energy you feel when you walk into a room where people have been talking about you); nonetheless, I kept a positive attitude and proceeded to be kind and optimistic about the night.

Terica whispered to me that she had been looking forward to having me in Phuket because her other friend was boring and didn't want to do anything fun. In my mind, I'm like, "No, ma'am! We're getting off of this resort and we're about to go let Phuket have it!" We caught a taxi to Bangla Road, Phuket's nightlife district, and that's exactly what we did...Until her friend started acting like she was Terica's mother - monitoring how much alcohol she consumed and complaining about being out so late. Girl, just killing all sorts of vibes.

Here's where I ended up getting ditched...

I like to pretend like I'm Beyonce whenever I'm at a party. I'm swinging my hair, performing on tables, grabbing random people and dragging them to the dance floor. I go IN! And, Terica does, too. However, her friend was more conservative (and completely hating on the fact that we were having fun without her); so, instead of joining the party, she grabbed Terica, pulled her to the side, and told her she was drinking too much and should go home. Upon observation, I noticed Terica did look a little too intoxicated, so I grabbed us a table where she can sit down, drink some water, and sober up.

Then, one of the manager's of the bar walked over to me and said there was a well-known Thai movie star who saw me dancing and wanted to take pictures with me. I walked a short distance from where we were sitting to take pictures and, when I returned, Terica was vomiting allover the table. Yeah, I know. Gross. I went to search for the bar manager to see if she can have someone clean my friend's vomit up; and, when I returned, Terica and her friend had fled the scene. I turned around to walk out of the bar to see if I saw them and, before I can take three steps, the bar's security grabbed my arm and told me that I could not leave the bar until I pay the tab AND clean up Terica's vomit. I. Was. PISSED!

By now, two security guards, the manager, and the owner were surrounding me and would not let me leave until I at least cleaned up the vomit. The bar manager put in a good word for me to the owner and they agreed to not making me pay for Terica's and her friend's tab...but I still had to clean up the vomit.

Needless to say, I cleaned the vomit, ran out of the bar, and went looking for Terica and her shady friend to tell them how completely disgusted I was over what they had done. I caught up with them about a half of mile up the street trying to hail a taxi back to the hotel. Honey, I went off! I felt so betrayed. So hurt. Like, who does that??? Finally, after noticing people were pulling out their phones to Snapchat our argument, I decided to leave it alone, walk away, and never look back. The last thing these foreigners needed to see was three Black women acting ratchet in the middle of Phuket, Thailand. That night, I took one for the team. #QueensAbroad

I know a lot of you have been tempted to travel with friends because you're afraid of traveling solo. I've been taking at least two annual solo trips to foreign countries for the last three years and I assure you it's one of the most liberating and fun ways to travel. Truth be told, I had a feeling I shouldn't have agreed to join Terica and her friend in Phuket. I was already enjoying Thailand by myself. I didn't need them to add anything to an already wonderful and amazing trip. And, that's the thing, you're wonderful and amazing. By yourself.

Solo travel isn't for everybody. Some people are just happier when they travel with others. However, don't travel with someone just for the sake of not being alone. If your travel companion options are limited to people who don't like the same things you like or who are annoying, shady, negative, unhappy, and generally bothersome, you're better off going by yourself. Your trip will be so much more peaceful and fulfilling without them. The last thing you want to do is travel to another country with someone who ends up ruining the experience for you.

I'll be leaving for a solo trip to India next month. If you're thinking about traveling solo but still need some encouragement and inspiration, I'm your girl. You can follow me on Instagram, subscribe to my YouTube channel where I'll be posting solo travel vlogs, or you can shoot me an email with your solo travel questions. I'm here for you. We'll do this whole "live your best life" thing together. And, trust me, I won't ditch you. I know how that feels. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

With love,

Quan Lanae Green

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  1. I loved your article!! Sooo funny and yes, I have a few "friends" that I've learned never to travel with...EVER!

    1. Lol! Yes, most of my friends are on my "Do Not Travel With" list. Lol! I just enjoy solo traveling better. It's a deeply personal and spiritual experience for me. I'm weird like that. 😉 Lol!

  2. I loved the article. They shouldn't have left you. But, Tricia friend doesn't seem like a bad person. She was trying to keep her friend from getting out of hand in a foreign country and that's exactly what happened. To throw up in a bar in a foreign country is not a good look.

  3. I loved this article! I felt so much comfort and closure from a terrible experience in Malaysia a few months ago. I think what I went through was much worse, and I don't think I've healed from it properly. I'm just glad I'm not alone, because my confusion about the person's actions left me wondering if my reaction was normal. I first started following you when I traveled to Hong Kong solo last year. And I really wanna go to India too! Have a wonderful time there! Can't wait for your India pics!!

    1. Awwww!!! Your first comment on my blog!!! Thank you so much! Girl, being ditched is one of the most awful feelings. And, like you, I thought I was the only one who had gone through something like that. Initially I questioned how I was feeling, too. Like, "Am I tripping?" Answer was: No! I was able to heal over time-took me nearly a year. I pray you recover and heal quickly as well. Some people are just better traveling solo until they find the right travel companion(s). Perhaps you and I are those people. Lol! #WithLove