Okay, so I know you want to be fabulous. Who wouldn’t?! Fabulous people are crazy attractive and live amazing lives. We’re truly exceptional and extraordinary. There are really only two types of people in life: average people and fabulous ones. I don’t want you to be average; so, without further ado, I present to you The 10 Fab Commandments!

1. Thou Shalt Know Who You Are

Pretending to be someone else is not cute. There’s something about you that works; find what it is and work the hell out of it. Literally have a sit-down with yourself and write down all the things that make you who you are: your personality, your upbringing, your likes and dislikes. This will help you to see what sets you apart from everyone else. If you want to be fab, you have to be different. Discovering who you really are and letting that person shine will make you one fabulous chick!

2. Thou Shalt Get Counseling

Or at least have somebody to talk to about your problems. Let’s face it, we all have problems, unless you’re Beyonce. And even Beyonce has a crazy sister who beats up her husband in elevators and a father with three different baby mommas. There are all sorts of problems that need to be worked out: problems on the job, problems with finances, problems that stemmed from childhood. When these things go unchecked, they make you bitter and unhappy…and being bitter and unhappy is NOT fabulous!

3. Thou Shalt Not Feel Ashamed

If you’ve been following my blog, you probably know by now that I had a horrific childhood – one that I will talk about in detail in my upcoming book From Poughkeepsie to Paris: A Ghetto Girl’s Journey to Becoming a Fabulous Woman. There was a time when I was embarrassed and ashamed about the things that happened to me; but, as I got older (and followed Commandments #1 and #2) I began to accept who I was and used it to help others. Feeling ashamed will hold you back from being all that God has created you to be. When you’re fabulous, you don’t let anything hold you back; instead, you use everything to propel yourself forward.

4. Thou Shalt Be Happy

What makes you happy? Have you ever asked yourself that? You ever notice how fabulous people are always smiling? It’s like there’s an inner glow that surfaces. That inner glow is called “happiness”. When you’re happy, you make other people happy and comfortable around you. You become infectious and others will want to have what you’re having. Happiness is attractive. Ladies, if you’re looking for a man, one of the main things you should be is happy. Smile. Laugh. Be jovial. Everybody loves people like that. Become happy and they’ll love you, too!

5. Thou Shalt Think Highly of Thyself

Fabulous people know we’re fabulous and we know what makes us fabulous. Because we take inventory of our accomplishments and we hold onto every compliment we’re paid, we have a constant supply of belief and confidence in ourselves. And you should, too! When you think highly of yourself, others will begin to think highly of you as well…and they’ll treat you accordingly. Know that you’re worth every good thing and luxury this world has to offer. Require excellent service and high-quality accommodations. Expect the red carpet to be rolled out for you everywhere you go. The fabulous person knows they’re worth it. Want to be fabulous? Then you have to know you’re worth it, too!

6. Thou Shalt Handle Compliments Gracefully

Have you ever given someone a compliment only for them to turn around and discredit the very thing that you just complimented them on? It’s a turnoff and an indication that their self-esteem isn’t as high as it should be. Even if you’re having one of those days where you don’t feel topnotch or up to par, still handle compliments gracefully. If someone says, “Hey, girl! Your booty looks good in that dress!” Don’t humiliate yourself (or the compliment giver) by saying, “You think so, girl? I just gained 10 pounds and I feel like a slob!” No, ma’am. Don’t ever say that! Just simply say, “Thank you.” Be sure to smile and pay them a small compliment as well. Practice being graceful and elegant in all you do and you’ll find yourself in the fab society in no time!

7. Thou Shalt Soften Up

Growing up in the ‘hood, I had to be hard all the time. I never knew when I’d have to fight a group of girls or run from stray dogs. I wore Timberland boots, jerseys, and baggy clothes. It wasn’t until I moved to LA in 2001 that I discovered the beauty of femininity. Once I embraced everything that made me a girl, I began to feel free, and light, and flowy. Sometimes our femininity is robbed from us by our circumstances, by things that happened in our childhood, or by our environment. But, if you want to be fabulous, you have to soften up. Think all things pretty and pink and soft. Wear dresses. Put on some makeup. Embrace your femininity. God gave it to women for a reason. There’s power in your femininity!

8. Thou Shalt Make (And Keep) More Money

Fabulous people are high maintenance and it takes money to maintain ones fabulousness. It’s imperative that you learn how to spend your money wisely, make more money, save more money, and invest more money. You have to see money as a tool for you to live the life of your dreams. Attend seminars or take courses on finance and budgeting. You could even watch videos on smart money management and investing on YouTube. One thing I did starting off and even now is seek the advice of people who are doing better than me with their money. No matter how you go about it, you have to begin to educate yourself on how to become rich because, frankly speaking, you can’t be broke and fabulous at the same damn time. That’s called being faux-fabulous and being faux-fabulous is not cute!

9. Thou Shalt Travel

There are reasons why fabulous people love to travel: it makes us well-rounded, it increases our value, we meet amazing people, we learn different languages, and it makes us stand out from average people who never leave (and aren’t even interested in leaving) the city they grew up in. If you want to move up in status, the people you’ll encounter will be well-traveled; and, if you’re not, they’ll begin to question your credibility, knowledge, and ability to make things happen. Traveling is a huge part of the fabulous lifestyle. And, once you begin to travel more, you’ll find that you’ll begin to live life on an exceedingly higher, more fabulous level. Like a wise, fabulous woman once told me, “The more fabulous you get, the more fabulous you get!” 

10. Thou Shalt Give Back

It’s truly a privilege to be fabulous. It means you have more than enough, you’re living a full life, and you’re blessed and favored beyond measure. God doesn’t allow you to become fabulous to feed your own ego and brag to the world about how great you are. A part of being fabulous is being humble enough to serve and give back to others. If you’ve done your work after reading Commandment #1, you would have identified something about yourself that you can use to be a blessing to others. There are certain things that you’re passionate and feel deeply about. For me, it’s homeless people, foster care children, and broken women. What about you? What pulls on your heartstrings? Find out and begin to volunteer at organizations that serve the people you’d like to give back to. You can also donate clothes, give money, or support charities. Whatever it is, you absolutely have to give back.

That, perhaps, is the most important commandment of them all.

With Love,

Quan Lanae Green